If you’d like to skip my Hooman Thoughts, change the category from where you found me to Chewing the Cud.

I just have to say, being human is hard. Could someone be my keeper? I could curl up onto an enormous heated meat suit and sleep for more hours than humanly possible.

I try to make heads and tails of what life gives me, but I was thrown a curve this month. They showed me the arthritis on the x-rays, with the wear and tear. It was OA, right? They gave me Mobic to unknot everything and physical therapy to re-support the L vertebrae and strengthen and tip my pelvis correctly. AMAZING. I felt great. How could this be?

Well it could be because you were on something that works too wonderfully. Mobic will long term cause organ damage and is only supposed to be used in short courses. It’s meloxicam, and they tell you that every time you get it for your cat, dog, guinea pig, rat, bird, bunny, hamster, chinny, yo mama, etc. When it wore off, it was like I had never been in this body before. It’s everything that I’d been living with for at least a few years now, but it’s been contrasted by something. The muscle pains, the neck pain, the ridiculous allergies, the chronic dry eyes, and now nearly daily it’s a big headache that needs generic excedrin. It explains why I have troubles breathing that I can’t fix, and I choke on my food, and here it is:

Widespread inflammation. Is it osteoarthritis? I bet it is… I saw it on the scans. That doesn’t mean it’s the only thing, and I see physical therapy next week for the last session, the orthopedist the next day, and I betcha that I am going to end up seeing a rheumatologist. You can’t throw a hand of ibuprofen at this. Every OTC bottle of anti-inflammatory says not to exceed a certain amount on the regular because it’s your liver and kidneys that have a time breaking it all down.

I’m happy to know that I can be without pain. I’m pissed to know it’s all on me. However, this does qualify in my state for medical marijuana, and if that means I can go to bed and get a night without tossing and turning, I’ll take it.

I just want to get through those appointments next week to get to the next thing. This hiatus/limbo is bananas. B ANANA S.